THE FITTING ROOM
Character: Jackson, Male, early 30’s
Having attempted to pick up Marci by having her try on an "outfit for my sister's birthday," Jackson reveals his problems talking to women.
JACKSON: Every Monday afternoon for eight years I’ve gone into Meyer’s Deli for a corn beef on rye. Why? I hate corn beef. Why? I hate rye! Why? Because Andrea works there. Andrea is beautiful. For eight years I have watched how she talks to people, how she looks at people. I have memorized everything she’s ever said.
The first time I went in, she said, “You look like a corn beef and rye kinda guy.” I said, “Yeah”. Every Monday for eight years, that’s what I got -- didn’t even have to ask for it.
Sometimes I see her looking at me. That look. You know the one. Like yeah, I might go out with you if you had more money or a nicer car, or, maybe you’d just ask me.
Eight years I go to this deli. And one Monday last month, I have this, you know, premonition. I’m feeling queasy sitting there, hunched over my sandwich, holding up my Wall Street Journal -- pretending that I have not lost the ability to read in her presence. I hear her talking to a customer. She says it’s her last Monday. Oh. My. God. She’s getting married. Married! Before I know it, I start weeping. I have my head down on the table. I got mustard everywhere! I just can’t control myself. Andrea asks me if there is something wrong with the sandwich. There is this stranger who has everything in the world, and I have nothing! Nothing! The stranger knows Andrea. The stranger has even talked to her!